37 and 30-year-old sisters take a DNA test and discover they’re only half-sisters and don’t share the same father, and their mom expects them to keep it a secret

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  • Two women standing back-to-back outdoors with confident expressions and dark clothing.
  • My sister (37F) and I (30F) discovered through a DNA test that we’re actually half sisters. Our mom (53F) expects us to keep it a secret.

    Last year my sister and I took DNA tests and discovered we're actually half sisters. My mom knows we know, but refuses to talk about it and expects us to treat it like a secret.
  • My sister (37F) and I (30F) have been living together for a few years. My sisters have always been my best friends, and the sister I live with and I are especially close.
  • For a long time she suspected our dad might not actually be her biological father because she looks nothing like him. So we decided to take DNA tests.
  • In July 2024, we found out we are actually half sisters.
  • At the time we didn't tell our mom because she was going through cancer treatment and we didn't want to add more stress. Thankfully she is cancer free now.
  • My mom is very old school Mexican and has never been good at talking about difficult things. When emotional
  • Two women discussing notes together during focused conversation on living room couch.
  • topics come up she tends to cry, shut down, or avoid them completely. My sister has gone to
  • therapy and has really worked on breaking some of those generational patterns.
  • My sister told my mom she knew in August 2025. That conversation happened privately between them. During
  • that conversation my mom said my sister's biological father passed away when she was about
  • one year old. She also said she would try to draw a picture of him or find a photo.
  • But she hasn't followed through.
  • They've only talked about it maybe three times since then.
  • My mom knows that I know, but she refuses to acknowledge it with me at all. She also doesn't want to tell her husband or
  • anyone else in the family, which basically means we all have to treat this like a secret.
  • My sister has handled this incredibly well and still talks to my mom regularly, but their conversations are very surface level like "how's the weather" or "are you working today."
  • Meanwhile I've pulled back a bit. I don't really call my mom anymore. She calls every couple weeks, talks about her day, doesn't really ask about me, and then says goodnight.
  • Part of me understands there may have been complicated circumstances back then. But that was 37 years ago. What bothers me is how she's handling it now.
  • I feel like my sister deserves more openness about where she came from. It may have started as my mom's secret, but it's my sister's life.
  • The problem is if I bring it up directly my mom will probably cry, shut down, or say I'm hurting her feelings.
  • How does someone even approach this? We don't wanna loose what little relationship we have with her.

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